It's a Celebration, Charlie Murphy pt.2

Wow. This little blog just hit 1500 views! 

I still have no idea who any of you people are.

I am okay with that.

And now, another haiku, this time about one of my great loves; one I have only discovered in recent years, but is now dear to my heart.

Deviled Eggs: A Haiku

You are so tasty

I cannot get enough

My wife's nostrils die.

... AhTHANK you.

Jared

I am bleeding.

GINGER HULK SMASH!!!  ... Glass.

XLERATOR- A Haiku

I wash my hands. Hope
that you are free, as you are
King of Air Dryers

My Stand-In

I have decided that I will hire a chunky, redheaded, only-slightly-balding, verbose, grossly overconfident actor to take my place at sundry events in my life. I am stretched too thin, and this appeals to me for many different reasons:

1. Going to events I only sort-of want to go to:

That family reunion you dread because you punched your cousin that one time after a heated game of Mah Jongg? The uncomfortable "double-date" where the girls know each other, but you and the other dude have NOTHING in common? These are all easy stand-in spots, because no one really wants you to show up and care... that is not what you are there for.

2. Finishing arguments.

Because what I really need to do in any featured argument between me and My Beautiful Wife is to SHUT. UP. But I don't. And can't. So having the stand-in there to greet her fury with blessed silence instead of having to get the last bloody word in EVERY. TIME. would be of immeasurable value to me.

3. Job interviews.

Interviews are hell specifically because they are so subjective. The actor would be only mildly pre-coached to mix it up and see what happens. This would be one I would want to tape and watch later for football-style instant replay commentaries;

"Well Chuck, it looks like the Suit behind the rich mahogany desk has now asked him the dreaded "Where do you see yourself in 5 years?" question!! How do you think this one is going to play out?"

"It could go either way, Bob.  The last time he was asked this question, he professed plans for world domination, which didn't go over well with the charitable organization he was interviewing for!! However, in this case, the Suit behind the desk might actually mistake his idiocy for ambition and "like his moxy", or something similarly ridiculous!"

4. Run-by Fruitings.

 I would pick the targets to make sure they deserve a little mango juice dripping into uncomfortable places, and the stand-in would do the dirty work. (I still like 'Mrs. Doubtfire' after all these years. Sue me.)

5. Standing in line for popcorn at the movie theatre.

Seriously, do I need to explain this?

6. Branding.

I would hand-write a sheet of witticisms that I regularly say (and some that I do not) for the stand-in to insert into conversations. After a time, it would become common knowledge that these are my trademarked phrases, and I could make a mint selling t-shirts with them emblazoned across the average dude's chest.


Well that's it for now. I may continue with this line of thought at a later date. The possibilities are just now truly coming into focus!

Jared

A Preview of Things To Come...

So I have almost finished my time in the studio! Colin is working on some hard-core technical editing, and I can now sit back and wait a bit while the magic happens. ;)

Here is a preview clip from the album. I am very proud of it, and grateful to Colin for his collaborative spirit.  This sounds very different than it ever has (and it's been around since 1996)!

If you like it, donate and get the whole darn album!
Click the link below to be taken to the Indiegogo site and be able to tell people at dinner parties that you "support the arts".  ;)
http://www.indiegogo.com/projects/whispered-words-the-revelation-sessions-e-p/x/2345013?c=home

And the Beat Goes On...

http://www.indiegogo.com/projects/whispered-words-the-revelation-sessions-e-p/x/2345013

I cannot express how great it is to be back in the studio and working on the album again after an almost two-week break!!  Colin and I are going back through some stuff that we were just sketching out before and tweaking the last couple of things that were bugging us. We retooled the opening and ending of a few songs already today to make the songs stand more on their own and not sound "same-y" (my eloquent term, of course).

Colin still astounds me with his ear.  I am so blessed to be working with someone who is such a natural musician and has spent a lot of time honing his technical craft as well! The care he puts into everything is enormous!  He also has this crazy ability to hear me describe a vague concept and create something concrete to match it within just a short time; it blows me away.

As any of my regular readers know, I have launched an Indiegogo campaign for the album to fund its release, and we are at 46 days remaining, and have reached $225 in donations!  I am praying and hopeful that people will still find it in themselves to donate to the project before the time lapses. I occasionally feel pangs of guilt about essentially asking friends and family for money in this way, but My Beautiful Wife reminded me that whomever invests in the project is simply paying for their copy of the finished product in advance! This is not simply donating- it is truly investing in something! I am going to keep including the link on these posts, as this is a big deal in my life right now, so why not? As always, a donation is one way you can help support this, but sending the campaign to others via email or social media and promoting it is a big one too!!

Click here to be taken to the Whispered Words: The Revelation Sessions Indiegogo page and see how you can get involved!!!

Click HERE to be taken to my Whispered Words band page on Facebook! Browse it and "LIKE" it to get regular updates on the project! I will be posting a song clip from today's session soon, I think!

I am including the photo that will most likely be the cover art for the album! I took it myself at Westminster Abbey in London. Not bad, Jared... not bad. ;)

Until next time,

Jared

Goodbye To A Good Dog.

My family's dog, Suzie, just died today.

She was diagnosed with cancer just a couple of months ago, and was fighting mightily this last while just to stand up and walk normally or eat. My Mom couldn't stand to see her suffering like this any more, and took her in to the vet to go to sleep.

Suzie was a good dog.

She was a rescue from the SPCA about 9 years ago, and had been abused by her previous owners;  she was therefore really grateful to have a loving family around her.

She turned my old-school Dad into a softie.

She was my Mom's constant companion.

She shed all over our home, but we didn't care.

Though I had already moved out when they got her, I have always thought of Suzie as "my dog", too. She was gentle and playful with me in a way the pet I grew up with never was, and she was one of the only dogs My Beautiful Wife has ever really expressed affection for.

She was a good dog.

I will miss her.

That dog loved cucumber.